Thursday, December 20, 2012

Where I am From

I am from scattered I love you's and sometimes hugs
            To frequent cursing and steady neglect
To the occasionally thrown salt shaker aimed at my head

I am from a scruffy man who smells like whiskey and drugs
Where “twit’ and “brat” are his least offenses,
            leaving boo-boo's and ouch's on a too-young heart.
I am from the mother’s adage:
      Always buy quality; never settle for less; you don’t need a man;
                         I’ll give you a reason to cry

I am from no ma’am, yes ma’am,
I’ll never do that, I’ll always do this,
            Yes ma’am, yes ma’am, yes ma’am

I am from bullies and teasing and make-good threats
          To empty swings, lonely lunches, and night-time sobs.
                     To the inheritance of silent screams from another splintered mind.

I am from sharpened razors, the uncle's whiskey, and swallow-me pills,
               From trying desperately to forget
                         To no longer being able to remember

I am from self-deprecating thoughts and hope run dry
             To hearing voices tunneling through the echoes of my mind.
                         To a steady stream of you'll never be close to good enough

I am from failures and mistakes and what was I thinking
            To I'll try again just in case
                           To listening to the one who is slowly teaching me
                                     I am so much more than where I am from.